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Bad reasons to try poly dating

Lovers either has actually dubious reasons for having just starting to talk about poly dating. Maybe you to spouse has been caught cheating, and you can wants a method to “have its cake and you may eat it”, rather than performing the difficult individual progress meters knowing as to why it betrayed the partner’s believe.

Often, you to spouse is actually bisexual (usually the woman in a great heterosexual relationships), and partners thinks it would be merely pleasant to find a fairly, unattached, young bisexual lady to move in with these people and you will “make their nearest and dearest complete”. Polyamorous communities make reference to such brand new-to-poly-looking-for-our-special-girl partners “unicorn seekers”, because trying to find a totally single polyamorous bisexual girl that is just as keen on each other partners from inside the a preexisting few is all about once the more than likely once the in search of a unicorn.

However, shortly after 15+ years into the polyamorous matchmaking, Used to do has just find an excellent bisexual woman who was simply totally attracted so you can both me plus one regarding my lovers. She will not qualify because an excellent “unicorn”, yet not, since she already had several enough time-name partners whenever we came across their!

I’ve seen partners where you to definitely spouse extremely planned to hop out the relationship, and additionally they check out polyamory in an effort to feel the reluctant lover stay in some way, even while no matter if also are leaving in some way. Which always leads to tears. (more…)